RESPECT

Let's normalize Respecting ourselves again

I have been thinking about the best platform to convey this message to our brother Gilbert Arenas. I thought about reaching out to some sports networks, but I was afraid the message would be diluted in the sensationalism we have become accustomed to, and that it would somehow lose some of its substance. Then I considered finding a media personality who possesses both the education and the cultural awareness to comprehend the objective of this message and how pertinent it might be. My hope was that they could amplify it across the global African community, i.e., all Afro-descendants.

I am a father of 3, a proud African man, a self-proclaimed Kemit. Born and raised in Gabon, I later immigrated to the US and quickly became familiar with African American culture and its struggles. Having studied Pan-Africanism, I understand how the struggle of the continent is linked to that of its diaspora. I understand that it is not by coincidence that the Civil Rights movements and African independences both occurred in the same decade. I understand how instrumental black scholars were in validating the thesis and studies of the late professor Cheikh Anta Diop at a time when the French intelligentsia was trying hard to silence or rather invalidate his work. As he benefited from the support of his brothers from the US and the Caribbean, American scholars such as Professor Molefi Asante also benefited from his erudition and multidisciplinary approach. I know that the concept of Pan-Africanism itself is as African American and Caribbean as it is African in its essence.
This is who I am. This is the culture that I claim. I was raised by a scholar and was fortunate to learn who I am, who my people are—not just in Gabon, the Loango people, and the former Kongo empire, but my global community, understanding the intricacies and complexity of our common history.

I was raised in a library that often told tales of tradition, culture, respect, as well as black nationalism and African Renaissance. This is how I am raising my children. So why am I saying all this, and how does it relate to Gilbert Arenas?
You may recall the comments he made last following the close exhibition basketball game between Team USA and South Sudan. Arenas went on a long tirade, mimicking a “blow dart” to designate my beautiful brothers of South Sudan and mocking the “shoeless” Africans. For all the talent that he had on the court, Arenas seems quite dense as a person, and I don’t mean to insult him but rather to point out his lack of self-awareness.
Hearing a black American man regurgitating all the racist tropes once used to antagonize black men in America is mind-boggling. I am not one to troll and attack folks on social media, but this one got my attention. Raising black African kids with high emotional intelligence, my most important duty might have been to help them navigate micro-aggressions at school and social settings, whether it be in Texas, the Netherlands, or today in Portugal. Just when I thought we were making strides, heating this tirade from a black man hit “a little different”.

My kids, like many other black kids in America and in the western world, share a unique experience. In the era of repressive political forces trying to outlaw history and knowledge of self, our kids are often stuck at a place where their burgeoning intelligence clashes with the stereotypical black images that society continues to promote.
Their anxiety comes in the form of them questioning their differences: the texture of their hair, the color of their eyes, their complexion, etc. At a very young age, they have to learn to carry the weight of intersectionality and the structural violence of the western world towards its melanated people. Being a kid of color in a (still) majority white world, they often come home drained. This is the reality for a lot of black and African parents, and our job is to give them enough confidence and love for them to go back the next day at 100% of their capacity, knowing that their mental battery will be close to zero upon their return. We tirelessly repeat the cycle over and over again, day after day, year after year, until they build sufficient mental fortitude and self-love to function on their own. Hearing these words from the mouth of a black man is like telling them that there is no hope. That the enemy is within.
The sad part is that brother Gilbert comes across as quite arrogant in his ignorance, and one can’t help but feel nervous about engaging with him on this subject as he might just drag me down to his level and beat me with experience. So, I am using social media as my outlet to send this message. On behalf of my kids: do better. I am no fool, I get it, all skin folks ain’t kinfolks, but as a grown man, let alone a black man and a father of black kids, this is low. This moves us backwards. And my kids deserve more. Better yet, Gilbert, your kids deserve more.
I get it, we are living in the social media era, and everything is good for a click and all publicity is good for business. But we all know brother Gilbert would never attack certain communities.

He allows himself to attack Africans just like he once went after dark-skinned black women: because he can; because he understands the colonizer power structure and those are unprotected categories that one can safely mock and antagonize without fear of any repercussions.
Let me be clear: I don’t wish for this brother to be cancelled but rather reset.

As a community, we need to normalize demanding respect, holding our folks accountable rather than making excuses for their behaviours. We deserve as much.

Peace Up

Amoan